Title: My Sacred Duty
Author: MC
Rating: PG-13 for major angst
Summary: As Sirius failed to protect Harry, Remus failed to protect his own Godson.

Notes: I based this story on two RPs I play Remus on. On HP-RPG, Remus has developed a close relationship with Neville. On First War, Remus was close to Alice and Frank during the original days of the Order. It spawned this story.

Dedicated to Jan, Fre, Manda and Kim-- Who are awesome players of Neville, Frank and Alice.

****

I sat beside Frank on the steps in front of his home. Lily and Alice were in the garden, comparing bellies. James and Sirius were whooping it up, occasionally rubbing their large stomachs, making comments about the babies learning karate while the girls weren't looking.

Frank blinked. "I didn't know being a Godfather required a lot of biting. You'll do fine." He nudged me again. "Besides, there's no guarantee something will happen."

****

Something did happen. It shouldn't of. It wasn't supposed to. The war had been over for a year and a half. We still couldn't guarantee anything.

I rushed into your home, darting between the Aurors milling around.

"Bloody hell," Moody gruffed. "Should've known those filthy pigs wouldn't stop, even with You-Know-Who gone. But we got 'em!"

"But Frank and Alice..." Emmeline shook her head sadly. "Are they going to be all right?"

I stopped, looking at the two stretchers. Frank and Alice were strapped down.

Beautiful Alice, so strong and vibrant... Her dark hair had gone stark white. Her eyes were bloodshot, open wide.

Frank, brave and true... His hands are bleeding. He clenched his fists so tightly, his fingernails split through the skin.

I stared at them, my breath catching in my throat. I shut my eyes tightly. "What the hell happened?"

"Death Eaters," Kingsley explained, calmly. "Four of them. They were trying to find You-Know-Who. Thought the Longbottoms might know. They've been..."

He didn't need to finish. I knew. They had been Crucio'd into insanity. When you'd been a member of the Order as long as I had, you had seen this sort of thing before.

"Remus?" Emmeline placed a hand on my shoulder. "Are you all right? They were your friends."

They weren't just my friends. They were the last of my friends. Sure, I hadn't been as close to Alice and Frank as I had the Marauders. They had been a year ahead of us in school.

Once we joined the Order that changed. Fighting side-by-side, we forged a tight friendship. We had become comrades-in-arms. They trusted me implicitly, as I trusted them. I even let them know my secret. When they needed a Godfather for...

"NEVILLE!" I shouted, jerking to face Emmeline. I gripped her shoulders tightly. "Where's Neville? Did they--"

Emmeline looked down, unable to meet my gaze. She pointed to the corner. "Dumbledore's been trying to get him to talk since we got here. No one can... It's just not working."

I pushed passed Emmeline, kneeling beside Dumbledore. Tears stung my eyes as I looked down at Neville.

Barely three years old, too young to see this sort of trauma. His chubby little cheeks, the ones Frank loved to pinch, were stained with a mix of blood and tears. "Merlin..."

"They turned on him," Dumbledore said sadly, "When Crucio produced no results, they tortured Neville instead. Alice and Frank didn't say anything, so they... Finished with them. We have healed him the best would could. He still won't speak. He was made to watch."

The lump in my throat wouldn't go away. I put my hand on Neville's shoulder, feeling in shake beneath me.

"You're Neville's Godfather, aren't you, Remus?"

I nodded, unable to say anything. How could anyone do something like this to other human beings? To a child?

Dumbledore placed a hand on my shoulder. "Would you like to try to speak with him? See if you can..."

"Yes," I croaked. "I'll see what I can do. I need to get him out of here. He's not going to say anything while he's still in this... Destruction."

I scooped Neville up in my arms, holding him against my chest. He was made to watch his parents suffer. It wasn't enough to just kill them. Those sadistic bastards wanted them to suffer; they wanted Neville to suffer.

Neville was supposed to be safe now. Voldemort had overlooked him, in favour of poor little Harry. Harry's sacrifice was supposed to be Neville's salvation.

But now, here he was, catatonic with shock. He was covered in not only his own blood, but also the blood of his parents. Silent tears kept sliding down his cheeks.

I carried Neville outside, breathing in the crisp night air. I rubbed Neville's back, trying to get him to take in the air, to take him out of the shock the Death Eaters had thrust him into.

****

I sat beside Sirius in the same place Frank had asked me to be Godfather three months ago. He held his godson, while I held mine.

"Day apart," Sirius murmured. "These two are going to be the best of friends growing up. Need to get a girl for their group, I think. Someone for them to fight over."

I laughed, rubbing Neville's back. He looked up at me with wide brown eyes, yawning. "I'll leave that to you, Padfoot. You're the one with a girlfriend."

"We've got to make things better for them," Sirius whispered. "The war's getting more intense. They can't grow up in this world. We have to change it. It's our sacred duty to protect them."

****

Our sacred duty. Neither of us did a great job, did we, Padfoot? You betrayed Lily, James and Harry, while I wasn't able to protect Alice, Frank and Neville.

It might have been too late for you, but it wasn't too late for me. I could still protect Neville.

I sat down in on the step, cradling Neville close to me. He would never forget the horrific images burned into his mind. He would never be the same. Unless I did something for him.

"Close your eyes," I murmured to Neville. Miraculously, he listened to me. His eyes slid shut. I reached into my robes, pulling out my wand. Tears slid down my cheeks as I touch the wand to his forehead. "Obliviate."

The flow of tears stopped. Neville's breathing became normal, deep in sleep. I held him close to me, rocking him in my arms.

I sniffed the air, looking behind me to see Dumbledore. He sat down beside me. "It's not known how long it will take Frank and Alice to recover. You're now his guardian, Remus."

I looked down at the sleeping child in my arms.

James. Lily. Harry. Sirius. Peter. Alice. Frank. Everyone I cared about ended up lost. I was cursed forever. Werewolves were meant to be alone. When I tried to make a pack, I lost them. I could not condemn Neville to the same fate as my friends.

"I've calmed him down." I passed Neville to Dumbledore, standing up. "His Grandmother can care for him. I... I'm done with this."

I walked away from my Godson, feeling my heart tear. I could no longer be around people. All I did was get them hurt. The only way I knew to protect him was to never see him again. My sacred duty was to disappear.