by MC
Synopsis: Todd Tolansky tells his story.
Rating: Really bad language. Lots of swearing. R.
Author's Note: I SWEAR, I started writing this fic a few hours before the Toad conversation started up. I watched "Middleverse" and decided I really liked Toad and felt sorry for him.
***
I'm an idiot.
At least, that's what everyone tells me.
Avalanche.... What right does he have? He's the one obsessed with the valley girl, Kitty. He tells me every day he's going to bang her. Yeah right, Lance. I prefer my dates to be conscious.
Quicksilver.... Biggest fucking prick I've ever met. Could he be anymore arrogant? Ooooh! Look at me, I can run really fast. Well please, run really fast away from me.
Blob.... Now, him making fun of me, that's ridiculous. At least I can get up by myself. He sat in a beanbag chair once, not only did he break it, but it took him two hours to get off the floor.
Sabretooth.... Yeah, because anyone who dates Mystique is a fucking rocket scientist.
Mystique.... She's smart enough not to trust anyone. But get a little spine, bitch. Gets us kids to do her dirty work.
My parents.... What fucking right do they have to judge me? They abandoned me.
My name is Todd Tolansky. I'm 16 years old, and I treat people like shit. Why should I treat people better than they treat me?
I do remember my parents a little bit. They were assholes. Mom never held me, always kept me at arm's length. The only thing she let close to her was a bottle of Tequila. Said I was a worthless piece of shit.
I didn't always look so hideous. I used to be a real cute kid. I had a mop of messy blond hair and chubby little cheeks. You could never tell what colour my eyes were. They were always swollen shut, because of dad. Back when I was in kindergarten, before teachers stopped caring, they would worry about my bruises.
At first, I made excuses. I pretended to be really clumsy. Then I just stopped caring. I didn't say anything. My bruises went away. Because mom and dad went away.
I was only seven when they abandoned me. They took me to the Burger Barn for dinner. When I came back from the bathroom, they weren't there any more.
It was cold that night. I wandered around, holding back tears. I wouldn't show them I was sad. I would never show anyone.
Then she found me. Juanita. She was an illegal alien from Mexico. She lived in a shack alone. I sat on the step outside her door, shivering. She let me in, sharing the little bit of warmth she had.
I loved Juanita. She was such a good mother. She was so nice to me. Used what little money she had to get me food, and keep me clean. She was a neat-freak. Insisted I keep clean.
When I was thirteen, I was surprised my teeth were starting to turn green. I always kept real good care of them. I didn't know what was happening. Juanita noticed I was beginning to smell swampy.
One day, during our dinner of baked beans, a fly buzzed around me. SNAP! My tongue darted out and gulped him up.
I freaked, Juanita freaked. What the hell had happened?
There was a small part of me, deep down, that LIKED it.
The rest of me was disgusted. Flies? Gross!
I was really confused. What the hell was happening to me. I was scared. It was at this time I lost the only person I could turn to.
Someone found out about Juanita, and she was deported. I hid when they took her away. My whole fucking life was being turned upside down.
Without Juanita, I found that gulping down flies was the only way I'd be able to survive. Part of me loved it. Most of me just wished I was dead.
I decided that death was too easy. If the world was going to screw me, I was going to screw the world. I may not be the strongest or the toughest, but I'll spend my life fucking over as many people as I can.
Three years passed. I got the ability to jump really high and stick to walls. That was pretty cool. Made it easier to steal. I loathed the smell constantly surrounding me. What? I shower when I can!
I found other people like me, other mutants. Of course, they were all in a much better position than me. The "fabulous" X-Men. Oooh... I tremble at your scary, matching costumes.
The first I met was Scott Summers. He acts all fucking superior, to even his own friends. Pretends that his life is so hard because he's a mutant. Oh, it must be SO hard to be handsome with a red convertible and a hot redhead on your arm. My heart fucking bleeds for you, dude.
The redhead, Jean Grey, is as boring as dirt. Fucking hot, but has no personality. I guess she and Summers are made for each other. They can have beautiful, snobby children. Really, those X-Geeks preach equality, but spend most of their time talking about how they're better than me.
If there was one X-Man I ever wanted to kill, it was the blue guy. He think he's so cool. He doesn't ever realize people think he's as big a loser as me. What's with that lingo he uses. Dude, you're German. Stop overcompensating for being from the land of Nazis by talking like a skater. And pull up your fucking pants. No one wants to see those hideous lime green boxers.
The one Lance wants to screw, Kitty is a major joke too. Complete airhead. Can you, like use one sentence without, like, talking like a valley girl? Fer sure! You know, one day people are going to stop finding you cute. You'll be old, wrinkly and talk like a moron.
The new guy seems like an asshole. Who does he think he is with that hair? Dennis Rodman? Acting like Mr. Fucking Cool. Doesn't he know skating went out in 1989? Thinking he's too cool for me to be in his stupid movie. Well, fuck him.
And then, there's Rogue. I never trusted her. Hell, I don't trust anyone. But Rogue was the last person I'd turn my back to. She's all in love with Summers. Doesn't she know he jerks off thinking Jean? That's probably the only reason she joined the X-Geeks, so she could drool over him.
Everyone needs to get over themselves. Realize that deep down, you're no fucking different from me. We're all freaks. Superiority is what I hate the most in people. Everyone thinks they're better than someone else.
As much as I hate the X-Men, the Brotherhood isn't much better. Everyone treats me like garbage. The Brotherhood thinks they're so tough, so strong, so smart. Not together, but as single mutants.
Except for the Toad. I don't think I'm better than anyone else. Because of that, no one else thinks so. The Brotherhood will fall apart. No one trusts each other. They'll kill each other, thinking the other is a threat. All except me. I'm not a threat to anyone. I'm a little waste of space. Not worth the trouble.
When the Brotherhood is dead, I'll go to the X-Men. Throw myself on Xavierıs mercy, crying I was led astray. Of course, they'll let me in. Those X-Geeks are such bleeding hearts, they think anyone can be turned.
Maybe I'm not that big of an idiot.